Leading Through Betrayal

Have you ever had a colleague you liked working with, even when no one else did? Maybe someone broadly misunderstood or with behavioral issues you could see past. Someone you stood up for, defended regularly, and found yourself in a good working relationship above and beyond all the reasons it didn’t make sense. Someone who, at times, didn’t deserve your support, encouragement, friendship and defense, but you went ahead and gave it to them anyway.

And then when the time came for them to show up for you, to defend you, support you, encourage you, a time you needed them more than you ever have, they completely, totally and wholly let you down.

I actually hope this hasn’t happened to you, but it just happened to me. And I’m so disappointed and hurt that it’s hard not to go back and revisit all those times I shouldn’t’ve but did stick up for and defend them. But all I can do is mark this experience as a data point, remind you what I should have seen all along, and learn the lesson so I don’t repeat it.

It just isn’t worth it to believe that things are different with you than they are with everyone else. Don’t waste your time on people, colleagues and friends that don’t deserve you. When someone shows you over and over again who they really are, believe them.

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